Grandpa
By Susan
One morning I woke up to the sound of Mom on the phone with my aunt. Dad was sleeping on the couch, and Mom was talking quickly. I found that odd, since it was early in the morning, and a Saturday. Usually, my parents never wake up earlier than they have to. They were talking about my Grandpa, and about how he got sick before. Before what? After the phone call, my mom told me that—Grandpa had passed away.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Ignorance
When I was little, I used to love going on rides on Uncle’s bike. He has this huge and super-fast bike (well… it might just be normal sized, since I thought an umbrella was huge back then too.), and often took me for rides in the evening. One morning, while I was having a walk with my Grandpa, I happily told him that Uncle would take me on a ride that evening. He said: “You know what? You should take a walk with me in the evening, instead of going on a foolish bike. A bike isn’t as healthy or as exercising as walking. Who needs to ride, when they can walk?” Well, I didn’t say anything, because I knew that he wasn’t being funny. That was actually what he thought, and what he thought others knew already.
When I was coming home with Grandpa, I was happily munching on a lamb stick when Grandpa suddenly ran ahead and picked a bright orange thing from the ground. Then, he gave it to me, and I saw that it was a piece of candy still in its wrapper. He said I can eat it, but I wanted to check with mom first. I wasn’t as sure as him that the candy wasn’t dirty. I didn’t comment, since he probably didn’t know that it was bad to eat it.
From these and other experiences, I gathered that my grandpa was kind of ignorant of modern-day facts. He loved me and my mom and aunt, but didn’t know how to express it. He thought he knew everything, and that the world revolved around him. Grandpa was a little…wait, VERY old fashioned. He still won’t believe some modern science or theories, and often wanted to just do the opposite of society.
Love
Grandpa loved me a lot, I can see that. On day, I was going to his hometown, where I usually stayed on vacations. On the train there, he was crying. I forgot why but I think it was because he was glad that I was back. That got me crying too, for I was easily swayed by others crying back then. Other passengers asked why I was crying, and he said because I was so glad to be back.
On a cold Chinese New Year’s Eve, my parents, my aunt, my uncle, and I think maybe a friend or two were celebrating at my uncle and aunt’s apartment. Then my grandpa came. I couldn’t remember much, but I knew that soon, he was leaving. Grandpa motioned to me that he wanted to tell me something, and he asked if I can spend the night at his apartment. Well, I didn’t really like sleeping in his apartment, with him watching me. However, I could see that he really wanted me to say yes. In the end….I forgot.
See, here is solid proof that my Grandpa loved me and my mother. Once, he even told me that I am really smart, just like my mom. He was saving ten thousand Chinese Yuan for me. He may be kind of crazy, but he cared for me very much.
Afterward thoughts
When I first heard about his death, I was stunned. I felt… I don’t know what to feel. Should I be sad? Well, I can’t think of a negative affect that his death will have on my life. I didn’t know what I should, or did, feel.
A couple of hours later, I suffered a feeling of loss. I suddenly remembered the times I’ve called him on the phone, and the pride in his voice when I told him I won an award. He always asked when we would come back, and I realized that for 4 years, he hasn’t seen us, and probably never will. Again and again, he would end the call with the question--When would you come back?
I suddenly realized that he was gone, GONE. It’s just so hard to accept, and I remembered that in the past years, he had grown lonely, and nobody liked him anymore. He has few friends, and people would avoid him. Grandpa was kind of annoying and ignorantly funny sometimes, and that doesn’t change my feelings for him. It just saddens me to realize that when he passed away, he hasn’t even seen his new grandson, and hasn’t seen part of his family in a long time. If he had just waited a couple more months, we would’ve given him a parting hug.
Why did he have to go so soon?
中文译文:纪念外公
| 予微 (2012-03-11 00:56:08) |
|
very truly love feeling from a grandkid. |
| 幸福剧团 (2012-03-11 04:01:12) |
|
小女子有才 |
